What is the term to call yourself when your ex-husband dies?  I feel like a widow, but I’m not legally a widow.  That’s what it feels like, and another friend of mine said that she felt that way when her ex-husband died, too, even though they had been divorced for 2 years rather than 6 months.  So, I guess that makes me an ex’s widow, or a widowed ex-wife, or just a full-time mom by Little Guy’s daddy’s choice.

Moreover, why do we feel a need to define relationships?!?  Why bother trying to define a relationship with a dead person?

While in the early, non-committed stages of my relationship with Y&H, he would ask me to define our relationship.  Are we dating, seeing each other, etc.?  We decided that we had a monogamous, non-committed relationship.  It made us laugh.  Now we’re each other’s lobsters, as in, dating, seeing each other, monogamous and committed to each other.

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2 Responses to Definition

  1. sideon says:

    Defining things in our lives is what we do. It’s human nature. And it’s not a bad thing to want to name that thing that two people share. The definition is something the two build and share between them, and it doesn’t need to be expressed or explained to anybody except the two of them, unless they choose to do so.


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