I think my phase is ending. I said I would end it on my birthday. Rather than having to force myself to settle down, it has happened on its own, either by my own subconscious decision or the phase forming a head like a big, itchy zit.
I feel tired today. Last night, I was supposed to attend a birthday party for an employee of mine. I felt tired when I got home from work. It could have had something to do with the delicious, pink, Rita-tini my boss and I decided to make and try. I’m sure it didn’t help, and my feet hurt. We sipped and stood on the deck and soaked in the warm sunset, something we hadn’t seen in at least a week. Anyway, I was getting ready to go to the birthday party that I was looking forward to (but not to the 30-minute, one-way drive to get there) when I got into a calm discussion with Husband, and the night ended here. One minute, we were talking, and the next I knew, I woke up this morning.
If it hadn’t been the end of my phase, I would have gotten up and gone to that party. Why do I do this to myself? I overcommit. I need to say “no.” I need to say it more and take the leap into my own writing, instead of helping everyone else first. Well, it’s an idea anyway. Yesterday, I got two more job offers doing things I don’t like, but it’s more income, and that’s hard to say “no” to.
One phase ends. My monthly cycle began… two weeks early. The moon and I are back together again. I imagine myself standing at the end of a pool. How many laps to take this time? What stroke to use? A relaxing back stroke? A powerful breast stroke?
More decisions on the way,