Talk Thursday – Cracks July 10, 2009

I took Little Guy to the park on Tuesday between appointments at the Ranch.  It’s my way of balancing all the work with some play.  He played on the slides while I skateboarded around on the ramps and flat area.  I wasn’t paying attention to what I was doing, rather to what Little Guy was doing, and 

Crack!

I skated over a crack too slowly and sent myself a few feet forward and skidded arm-first on the concrete.  My skateboard went a few feet in the opposite direction.  It took me a minute to catch my breath again.  I got up and played with Little Guy some more before getting back on the skateboard to try again.

If I had a camera, I would take photo of the cement’s imprint on my arm and shoulder.  I went to the hot springs the next night and the swelling went down, but my muscles still hurt in my arm.  

This should teach me to keep up the speed and pay attention to  what ’s coming up.

Talk Thursday – My Reason for not July 6, 2009

My reason for not: fear.  I need to call an attorney today to help me get my Ex to cooperate with our divorce agreement.  I have put it off for at least a month or two.  I’m afraid.  I’m afraid of his reaction.  It seems that every week, I slam him with another demand or criticism.  I refuse to answer his calls.  It’s what I’m left to do.  I have to take responsibility for me and Little Guy, and sometimes that means getting backup, legal-won’t-take-no-for-an-answer-get-shit-done backup.  He hasn’t taken responsibility, so I will.

I’m also calling on places to live today.  I have a day off from the Ranch, so I’m getting stuff done that I have put off for too long, such as finding a place to live, copying all of my summer contracts, copying keys, and a list of other things.  At least I did two loads of laundry, cleaned the kitchen, made Little Guy’s lunch, and cleaned the bathroom after I woke up with the sun this morning.  

Facing the music now,

Jenniphur

Talk Thursday – Attitude Adjustment July 6, 2009

I walked into work after the second round of guests had checked out last week to find a fairly tidy home to take care of after them.  Praise the stars.  I wish all guests left the house that clean.  

I went down to the basement and something they had done annoyed me, which set me off.  I took a minute, noticing my fierce and foul mood change over something small.  

“It doesn’t matter, I told myself.  Be thankful they left the house so damn clean and that it happened two weeks in a row.”  

I can’t ask for much more than that, and it’s not worth sweating the small stuff.  I have to keep my attitude in check.  I’m the boss, dammit, and I have a staff of six this year to motivate and keep on track, and if my mood sucks, so will theirs.  

I kept moving and everything stayed on track and organized last week, unlike the week before which was really just a cluster-fuck, since I was short a staff member and all of us work other jobs and have to carefully schedule time to keep the Ranch in working order or better.  We’ll see what this week brings, but I know that no matter what, only the big stuff matters.  Thank the stars I have a job and more work coming in and connections to get me to a better place soon.

What do you do to keep your attitude in check and positive?

Talk Thursday – Coming Back to Life July 6, 2009

It’s summer.  I get Sundays off.  In order to keep coming back to life every Monday, I will spend every Sunday this summer recharging my batteries, unless I have to work.  Just kidding.  I will really try to avoid working on Sunday.  Why, even now, I am refusing to let my Ex make me work on my day off.  The few things that I need to do for him can wait until tomorrow.  Some  of them have to be sent in the mail, so what difference does it make for me to do it tomorrow on a work day.  I know.  That’s pretty stubborn, but dammit, it’s my day off.

Sundays off mean that, come Monday, I come back to life.  And it’s a beautiful thing.